Sunday!

I am ever so slightly annoyed right now. Matt has his friend over to play Xbox, which i prefer to them doing it late on a Sunday night so I cant complain too much, espcially as I did just make him watch the x-factor. But I was tired and said I wanted a nap, was comfy on the sofa and he had put the cushions on nicely for me, without me asking! Then goes to get Ian and as soon as they are in the house hes like go upstairs if you want a nap...!!! So here I am, not napping which is probably a good thing but irritating non the less.
And yesterday Matt went fishing with, Ian, Ian (father and son) and 2 other people, as it was really cold they had a bonfire on the beach, fine, good idea if you ask me really. But what I didnt know until Ian came over to play xbox is that they were dipping wood in his motorbikes petrol tank and throwing it on the fire, putting batteries on it, lighters on it, plastic on it, which to quote ian 'smelt all funny and toxic like' REALLY!!!! YOU THINK!!!! Seriously unimpressed that a group of 'adult' blokes thought that was a good idea!!! Urgh, I hate Matt when hes around them, he acts like them to impress them and it really rubs me up the wrong way.
I just dont like them to be honest, the parents have never worked, have 4 kids, they get what they want, dont go without, Ian (little ian who is 18) has just gone off to uni, got every grant and maintenance loan available, and spent it on a motorbike, he also has a car!!! My parents worked their backsides off forever so I could go to uni and I didnt spend my loan on a bike! I hate their ignorant, racist point of views too, I hate how they use gay as an insult, I hate that they think its funny. Maybe this is just be being snobby or whatever, but really, if you must think like that and do stuff like that, dont bring it into my house and tell me about it, I just dont want to hear it. URGH.
We were talking about our hen/stag do's (long way off) but I mentioned that they are to be no closer to the wedding than 2 weeks (for his stag do anyway as I dont trust people who may have a say in organising) and on different nights as we will have a child to look after, and Ian said, 'oh my mum and dad will babysit' but i just dont want them to look after my baby, their house smells of smoke and I dont want my baby there, or them smoking in my house/garden. (that is anothing thing that fucks me right off, no job, on benefits, smoking!)
And as matt is now the actually redundant and so far his job searching is being fruitless, hes applying to everything, I got him a form for tesco today as a christmas temp, its better than nothing! I may well only be able to have 3ish weeks off after the baby is born, not the 6 months I wanted to have, I had a massive cry about it yesterday because I really want the 6 months off. We have enough in savings to cover the mortgage for that long if Matt cant get a job but its just acutally quite depressing.
But on a lighter note, Charlie came down to see me yesterday and it was lovely, we went to Babies R Us and spent nearly an hour in there, I got some more nappies - for £4.99 in 1 box I got a pack of nappies, some baby wipes and some baby socks! Cute. And I got about a million nappy sacks and some breast pads, exciting stuff! Charlie also got us some stuff, it is so hard to stop her! She got us a bed linnen set, just a basic one but its so soft and lovely, a musical mobile with jungle animals on and a pack of baby grows, and some muslin squares. We had good fun going through all the baby stuff when we got back, then we got take away pizza, again her shout, and had a good chat, it was lovely!
Right the battery in my dear lappy isnt going to last much longer and theres a pile of washing up with my name on and a chicken to roast!

PISSED RIGHT OFF

I am soooooo pissed off right now its unbelievable. You would think that with Matt being made redundant he might contribute to the house more in other ways, like say, the washing up from me cooking the night before that I asked him to do, or say, getting some milk that I asked him to do, that he told me he would, but noooooo. He has spent the last 5 fucking hours playing on the bloody xbox, washing up still there, milk still not in the fridge! And now hes telling me I 'fucked up his car' well, excuse me if turning the volume of the stereo up and/or down and altering the base levels cos they were too fucking high is, 'fucking up his car'. Put a fucking proper stereo in the damned thing then, I thought the whole point of sound systems is that the volume and base are adjustable. That, AND I HAVE NOT NOTICED ANY DIFFERENCE IN FUCKING SOUND QUALITY SINCE IVE BEEN DRIVING THE FUCKING THING!!!!
I told him what I wanted to do for tea so I half expected he would check if it could be cooked from frozen, but no, and it cant so now I have no idea what to do for tea and I just hurt my hand slamming the door and locking him outside. His own tough luck for not putting on a jacket and shoes or socks, he can bloody well freeze for all I care right now.
I hate how this is my fault in his eyes, ive been at work all day, everyday this week, bar my my midwife appointment which I think is fair enough, he has so far had 2 half days and plans on spending as little time in work the rest of the week and his last day is Friday anyway.
I just dont know where else to turn to when I get upset like this, I cant tell my friends or family in Reading cos I dont want them to know, I dont know anybody in Southampton I can talk to so im left with the virtual world to rant in, which is probably for the best. Im just so angry with him right now and in floods of tears. I was really hoping for a nice evening like last night but that just isnt going to happen now. He was going to go to the pub anyway, which irritates me, hes the one who has lost his job, hes the one who tells me not to spend money, and hes the one going to the pub everyweek. But 'its ok cos ian is paying' Ian who is his mate who him and his wife are both on benefits so not exactly flashing the cash around themselves, its ridiculous it really is! He just doesnt seem to care or realise how much he irritates me and makes me angry, because its never his fault, always mine, im always the stupid lazy bitch, clearly!
*screams*

Acheivement

I actually feel like I achieved something this evening, even though it really isnt anything much, by my recent sleepyness levels I am quite proud of myself. I left work, slightly late as I had been blocked in, now at one point I could probably have breathed in and got through the gap, but this ever increasing in size baby bump no longer allows me to do that. So I left work, went to Tesco, spent £30 on nappies (they were 2 packs for £10 so I figured id stock up) Baby Wipes, on 3 packs for £2.70, some dog food as Harry had eaten all of his and selfishly cannot fend for himself, hehe. I also got loo roll as that was reduced and had 3 extra rolls, it is sad that I am 22 and I think this is a good thing! Some peppers (of the veg, no, fruit variety - see me being technical there) some noodles and neopolitan ice-cream! I was suprised it was £30 but then, not really when I think about it. I also noticed a small dead (wierd looking) spider at the checkout in the bit where all your things end up when the till people wizz everything through at the speed of light, I debated with myself as to whether I should point this out, but then decided I probably ought not to for fear of causing alarm to the young girl on this checkout.
I got home, unpacked the shopping, did the washing up, cooked dinner (which was yummy) all of a sudden I got a fancy for chicken and veg stir fry (hence the peppers and noodles) and I am impressed at my veg consumption in 1 meal, check this out: Pepper (red and yellow) Baby Sweetcorns, Cabbage, Onion and Green Beans. Was yum! I also got the washing I put on this morning hung out, so all in all a productive evening which has left me tired, it was 20 past 8 before I sat down to eat tea, and now all I want is a hot bubbly bath and my cosy jimmy jams.
I bid you fair well. For now!

So I spent this weekend in Reading and it has been lovely, id move back there tomorrow if the opportunity came up, although it wont, not for a few years, but Reading is home to me, not Southampton. Anywho, it was a good weekend, Friday night after work sees me rushing around getting bits and bobs into a bag, enough pants, socks, t-shirts etc, the toothbrushes, making sure Matt has a selection of clothing to be sure I wont be told off for forgetting something, and ultimately forgetting to pack my own jeans... I think this time we beat the record, getting in, packed, car rammed full, dog fed/watered/toileted/bundled into the car and leaving again all in 20 minutes! Pretty damn good if you ask me, and we got to Reading about an hour later which is good, and arrived at the party just in time for food! It was some family friends birthday/fireworks party and it was really nice to see them all again. We met this family, and another who they have been friends with forever, on holiday in Crete 8 years ago now, and have stayed friends since, is pretty cool. The only thing that really peed me off when were there is when the fireworks started we went outside, Harry came too, and we sat down cuddling him watching the fireworks. He loves them! Not at all bothered by the wizzes and bangs, and likes to follow the flashes til they disapear. Well this bloke who I dont know but is often at parties with this crowd, he told me I was stupid and cruel for taking the dog outside! Cue pregnant me having forgo watching the rest of the fireworks and sitting inside with the dog holding back the tears, grr stupid man what does he know. Harry then spent the rest of the evening trying to get outside to see the fireworks and us holding him back, my mum and dad told us to ignore him and if I werent pregnant and full of volatile hormones id have been able to, but meh.

Other than that, Friday evening was lovely! The rest of the weekend was too, spent it doing not a lot at my parents house, the best way to spend a weekend if you ask me! My mum took us to the big mothercare shop on Saturday afternoon, I think we were there for about an hour, and she bought me some new trousers and a top and 2 cute sleep suits for baby! I think she is as excited about the baby as I am now!
Today we did even less, nipped into town first thing and got me some new pj's from primark, I LOVE new pj's! And popped into Tesco on the way back to my parents do get some shopping in and back for lunch of bacon and fried egg sandwiches and a cup of tea. Followed by watching Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix and a roast beef dinner complete with my mums yorkshire puddings! Delish! And now its TopGear time and theres a milkshake in the fridge with my name on it.
Pity tomorrow is monday and back to work, although I have got my 25 week midwife appointment in the afternoon so theres that to look forward to, and if nothing else is a break from the office for an hour and a half!

So Tired

This is bordering on insane, how tired I feel that is. I got up at 8 this morning when the dog began licking my elbow and nudging me with his head, as has become a morning custom recently. Thats half an hour later that I would get up during the week, and its now only 20 to 9, and I haven't done all that much today.

Went into town with Matt, his brother Jon and girlfriend Michelle, their step-sister Sarah and her boyfriend and Matt's best mate, Jamie. We had lunch at the slug and lettuce as is the norm for us, and a bit of a nosy around the shops. I bought some boots as I have discovered I have no 'wintery' shoes. I can't wear my heels for long any more due to balance issues, and my other shoes are mainly ballet pump type shoes, so now I have some cosy ugg style boots, and they were only £40 so I think thats reasonable.

I made a start on making christmas cards too this moring, ive made 5 I think, only about 2o more to make! I think they are better than last years so that is also a good thing.

Currently I am watching X Factor, I think Diana is the best on there this year, her voice is just really good and nice to listen to.

I can't believe we are in November already, my baby is due in February, thats like 3 and a half months away. In fact baby is due in 16 weeks! Eeeek!